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What happens when a person offers a service you consider offensive, unethical—even dangerous—and calls it coaching?
What can be done to make sure people who seek out coaching are protected, along with the public’s understand of what coaching means?
These questions—not new to the world of coaching—came up again last week, with newspaper and web headlines reading “Life Coach Forced Patients to Touch Themselves.”
The headline, of course, illustrating some of the confusion around coaching in general by referring to “patients,” and describing the coach alternately as a “therapist.”
According to statements made by two former clients of Alan Downing, is a life coach “sexual reorientation coach,” who helps clients “resolve unwanted homosexuality.”
The former clients claim Downing made the clients undress in front of a mirror and touch themselves while Downing watched, in sessions the men described as akin to a “psychological striptease.”
“It is tragic events like this that make me thankful for the International Coach Federation and the Code of Ethics that its members follow,” said Mark Strong, an iPEC and ICF certified coach who provides life coaching for gay men. “Mr. Downing, who is identified as an ‘ex-gay life coach,’ is not an accredited member of the ICF. As life coaches, gay or straight, we must remain united in our efforts to clarify and spread our ethical code and protect our field from unethical and unaccredited practitioners in coaching or therapy.”
The catch, of course, is that coaching leaves clients like these with few options when they believe a coach has subjected them to unethical treatment.
“If a client sees a coach and wants to file a complaint, ethical or otherwise—what is the standard? Where and with whom does the client file?” asks DeeAnna Merz Nagel, co-founder of the Online Therapy Institute, and a licensed mental health counselor. “There is no licensing board and while coaching certifications exist, certifications usually do not hold any legal or jurisdictional power.”
Merz Nagel says in any case, what Downing’s described as doing isn’t coaching at all. “He calls himself a coach but is engaged in reparative therapy. Reparative therapy is not recognized as a valid and reliable modality for therapeutic intervention,” she says. “But, at any rate, we can see the potential damage that can occur (even if we take a less extreme example) if coaches do not understand or respect emotional and physical boundaries of their clients.”
While coaches are clear on the boundary between coaching and therapy, stories like this one may add to the confusion that exists for some potential clients—or patients. “Honestly, I think many people are confused as to the difference between coaching and therapy, to begin with,” said Dian Reid, a coach who works with gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender clients on issues, including coming out.
“When I tell people I’m a life coach, people often respond, ‘Oh, you mean like a therapist…’ In my experience, people who have never received coaching have difficulty understanding just how different therapy is from coaching. Those who have experience with coaching get that it’s about moving people from their present into their future, while therapy tends to deal more with moving from the past into the present (my VERY truncated version of differences).”
For his part, Alan Downing describes himself as someone who has combined the study of “psychodrama and action methods” with “untold hours of mentoring men.” Efforts to reach Downing through his company, Higher Path Coaching, were unsuccessful.
Rich Wyler, the founder of Higher Path Coaching, did not respond to requests for comment.
Downing and Wyler work with a group called the International Healing Foundation, which refers potential clients to sexual reorientation coaches and, according to a bio of “sexual re-orientation coach” Dr. James Phelan, offers a certification in sexual reorientation coaching. Dr. Phelan did not respond to requests for comment.
Where does a niche like “sexual reorientation coaching” fit into the world of coaching? And if it doesn’t have a place, what can coaches do to clarify and address potential confusion among clients?
Where do clients go if a coach crosses the line?
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There are 2 Responses so far...
I believe all boils down to the definition of coaching, and there still is no generally accepted ‘exact clarity’ about what coaching is and is not.
To me this case of ‘resolve unwanted homosexuality’ sounds like ‘fixing the problem’.
For me, coaching means working on ‘improving’ an existing situation/issue (most of the time, the situation/issue already experiencing some success and needs to be taken to the next level); not ‘fixing’ the situation/issue.
Take for example: a client faces the challenge of motivating his/her subordinates to perform. Instead of working on how to ‘resolve’ the coachee’s inability to motivate (fixing problem), the coach could work on the platform where the coachee has enjoyed some successes in motivation (even very small successes) and build further from there (improving/enhancing successes). This to me, is where the power of coaching can make the differences.
Coaching to me means working from improving/enhancing further the coachee’s existing personal efficiency & effectiveness; and existing team/Organization/Societal existing efficiency & effectiveness.
Working on the coachee’s existing ‘deficiencies’, whether physical, psychological or emotional isn’t coaching to me.
What are your thoughts on my interpretation of coaching? Does my interpretation makes sense?
Billy C H Teoh
Malaysia.
Examples described here provide an excellent opportunity for the ICF to demonstrate true leadership in coaching as a profession. They ought to be conducting an investigation of the claims, regardless of whether the person is a member or certified by the ICF. They need to take responsibility to educate the public, and hold non-members accountable.
I envision a place on the ICF website where dubious, suspicious, or problem practices ought to be exposed or described, naming names. The ICF needs to help the public, not look the other way.